The past few days have seemed long yet have passed by fast at the same time. Does that even make sense? I realized today that I haven't been eating much the past 5 days. Often, just one meal...and not even a huge one. I had bad stomach pains on my left side about 24 hours ago...and then at school it started acting up again..but it wasn't a tummy ache. I felt nauseous and went home early. I spent much of the afternoon sleeping and in the fetal position or laying on the area that hurt. =\ Then, I felt like eating..just to eat when I realized I hadn't been eating...but I still wasn't hungry. I eventually ate and it made me feel worse. I have no idea what this is or what I'm going to do. One minute I feel hot, and the next I'm cold. I really hope it's just something stress related. Phil thinks its depression or some kind of viral thing. I would prefer it to not ruin my plans this weekend. On another icky note, I messaged Phil telling him my situation. (not the stomach pain situation...the thoughts on relationships situation) For some reason, just when things might have turned around for the better, my mind decided to stomp on the brakes and do "a little growing up". Pretty much, I just decided it wouldn't be fair to get back into a relationship with him when we're both not emotionally stable..(at least I don't think we are.) And I wondered if part of the reason I wanted to be with him was because he was like my safety net. I don't know. Only time will tell, but for now, its the single life for me. And...on a happier note..this weekend hopefully starts on Thursday night and consists of going to UF and the fair. I just really want everything to work out. I definitely don't want to screw up when I'm this close to being done and off to college.
Oh and I forgot how to mention how PERFECT yesterday was. I went over to Jen's house in the afternoon and we spent the day outside on the driveway doing homework. The weather was beautiful. Then towards sunset, Will and Miguel came over to chill for a little bit and we threw the football around until all I could see were the whites of Miguel's shoes hahah. At least there's some positive in all of this negative.
Oh and I forgot how to mention how PERFECT yesterday was. I went over to Jen's house in the afternoon and we spent the day outside on the driveway doing homework. The weather was beautiful. Then towards sunset, Will and Miguel came over to chill for a little bit and we threw the football around until all I could see were the whites of Miguel's shoes hahah. At least there's some positive in all of this negative.
